Saturday, March 29, 2008
All Jammied Up
Liliana wears two types of clothing: pajammies and dresses (I count the leotards in with the dresses). Yes, she does have pants, overalls, etc., but she will not wear them. This morning, I got up a little early to give Mattie and Heather a little more room in our quite cramped full size bed. Liliana woke up soon after I did and we decided to watch an episode of "Signing Time". During the show, Liliana tried to keep me from practicing the signs by wrapping herself around one of my arms, so I started to tickle her. Laughing, she signed "you're funny". I responded by signing "you're silly", which is our standard joke. She laughed and said "I'm not silly, you're silly". I then signed, "you're beautiful". She looked at me with a straight face and declared, "I'm not beautiful, I'm jammied!"
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Our thoughts on a heated subject
Well we have been asked by a friend to elaborate on our previous blogpost where we referenced Vaccines or Childhood vaccinations. I hope to answer why we have vaccinated LIliana and why we have yet to vaccinate Mattie. I also plan on adding a link so that you can learn for yourselves if interested.
I should start off by saying that this is a heated topic. As parents we want to do right by our children. I am sure we all do the best we can with the information we have at the time.
If I knew then what I know now, I would not have vaccinated Liliana with all of the vaccines. She probably would have had a small amount (possibly). For the most part I followed the standard American schedule for vaccines with L. For those who do not know, no other country gives as many vaccines as we do. For instance, in Japan, they give 7 shots over two years, as opposed to 30 for our children. This is one important factor. If I did choose to vaccinate I would adopt a different vaccination schedule (and any Pediatrician or Family Doc worth his salt would work with you in creating an alternate schedule). I would do this for several reasons:
1. Although as of 2004 or so Thimeresol (the mercury additive) was pulled from vaccines (it actually happened in 2001, but it takes several years for the old stock to be used up) by the FDA there are numerous other additives in the vaccines that are harmful to a young baby. It takes a good 18mts or so for the Blood-brain barrier to not be so permeable. When we inject a vaccine (in many cases we are injecting a live virus that is weakened), loaded with additives like mercury (which is still allowed in the yearly flu vaccine), aluminum, bovine serum, and a host of things that would make you cringe if as a parent you knew you were putting in your child, in a newborn baby it can easily cross that blood-brain barrier. Things like mercury and aluminum are toxic to the brain (this we are know from science class). Although our FDA has approved such additives as safe (setting safe levels for each additive), we have and continue to go above and beyond those safe levels when we inject more than one shot at a time. Sometimes, without realizing it, we are injecting 4-5 times the so called safe level of aluminum for instance.
2. Imagine you take your baby in for their well-child check up. You mention that she has been having bad skin reactions (this is usually a gut symptom, something she is eating is causing a reaction (or could be environment)) This means there is currently inflammation happening in her gut. Inflammation is not in itself a bad thing, it means our immune system is doing its thing. But long term inflammation is harmful to us and leaves us very vulnerable. So, you baby has skin rashes and eczema over and over, maybe she has had several colds, ear aches...maybe you have put her on medicine (antibiotics) several times in the last 6 months...(antibiotics by the way strip both the bad and the good bacteria from your gut, sometimes it strips most of the good and only part of the bad, for instance, I hardly submit to taking an antibiotic (which literally means, 'against life'), but when 8 mts pregnant I could not shake this head cold that was killing me. I took my weeks worth of pills and then got my first yeast infection...I had stripped my gut of the good bacteria, allowing an overgrowth of yeast (fueled by my 8mt pregnant person consumption of sugary foods). Then you take this child in to get 4 shots, 3 of which contain weakened live viruses that lodge themselves in their gut (measles loves to live in the gut). Not only have they been inundated with loads of additives over the so-called safe limit, they now have to contend with these weak viruses that are running through their body. So the spike a fever, their body is in fighting mode (more inflammation). What if they were already born with a weak immune system (either through genetics or toxic exposure during pregnancy)..add all of this together and it is a disaster for our little baby in the story. This is the multi-system idea behind Autism or other developmental and/or sensory issues in children. So to clarify, I do not believe children get autism from vaccines. I do believe that vaccines can/do cause problems when there are other mitigating circumstances.
3. So this leads to Mattie. Mattie has skin issues. Bad eczema. She is only breastfeed, so something I am eating is driving her gut into inflammation mode, and she cannot (or my diet cannot) pull her out of it (as a side note, with some experimenting, I think it is my dairy consumption (what I shouldn't be eating a bowl of ice cream ever night???)). I refuse to give my already immunologically compromised daughter shots that will drive her immune system into even more inflammation. It only takes so much before your body starts attacking itself or just shutting down (an always sick child for instance). I have a great doctor. He lets us decide her vaccine schedule (we have decided to re-evaluate vaccines for mattie when she is 18mts old), by then her body will be better able to handle any nasty additives should we feel the need to inoculate her against a few things.
4. We are not anti-vaccines. Liliana has had most (expect for ones we personally think are silly and not even worth the pain of the needle, like chicken pox and the flu) Mattie will probably end up with a few important ones like tetanus.
5. We are against the idea of forcing parents to give children shots (by not letting them into schools for instance). We also are against giving vaccines when babies are still in the hospital (like feeling the need to give a Hep B shot (which is a sexually transmittable thing-like our newborn will be sexually active anytime soon).
6. We believe in sound science. Let us honestly examine our current vaccines for the good and the bad in them and see how we can improve on them instead of being secretive and just hoping parents go along with the flow for profit sake.
7. If you want to learn all the science/research behind vaccines, check out that section in the following manual: "Changing the course of Autism:A scientific approach for parents and physicians"
8. If you want to watch the following it will also help explain:
http://anon.autismri.com.edgesuite.net/anon.autismri/Alexandria/HI%20video/DAN_VA_07_Parents_Cave_DSL.mov
Once again, these are decisions that are made by each family. I am sharing what we think/do. I hope this helps answer some questions.
I should start off by saying that this is a heated topic. As parents we want to do right by our children. I am sure we all do the best we can with the information we have at the time.
If I knew then what I know now, I would not have vaccinated Liliana with all of the vaccines. She probably would have had a small amount (possibly). For the most part I followed the standard American schedule for vaccines with L. For those who do not know, no other country gives as many vaccines as we do. For instance, in Japan, they give 7 shots over two years, as opposed to 30 for our children. This is one important factor. If I did choose to vaccinate I would adopt a different vaccination schedule (and any Pediatrician or Family Doc worth his salt would work with you in creating an alternate schedule). I would do this for several reasons:
1. Although as of 2004 or so Thimeresol (the mercury additive) was pulled from vaccines (it actually happened in 2001, but it takes several years for the old stock to be used up) by the FDA there are numerous other additives in the vaccines that are harmful to a young baby. It takes a good 18mts or so for the Blood-brain barrier to not be so permeable. When we inject a vaccine (in many cases we are injecting a live virus that is weakened), loaded with additives like mercury (which is still allowed in the yearly flu vaccine), aluminum, bovine serum, and a host of things that would make you cringe if as a parent you knew you were putting in your child, in a newborn baby it can easily cross that blood-brain barrier. Things like mercury and aluminum are toxic to the brain (this we are know from science class). Although our FDA has approved such additives as safe (setting safe levels for each additive), we have and continue to go above and beyond those safe levels when we inject more than one shot at a time. Sometimes, without realizing it, we are injecting 4-5 times the so called safe level of aluminum for instance.
2. Imagine you take your baby in for their well-child check up. You mention that she has been having bad skin reactions (this is usually a gut symptom, something she is eating is causing a reaction (or could be environment)) This means there is currently inflammation happening in her gut. Inflammation is not in itself a bad thing, it means our immune system is doing its thing. But long term inflammation is harmful to us and leaves us very vulnerable. So, you baby has skin rashes and eczema over and over, maybe she has had several colds, ear aches...maybe you have put her on medicine (antibiotics) several times in the last 6 months...(antibiotics by the way strip both the bad and the good bacteria from your gut, sometimes it strips most of the good and only part of the bad, for instance, I hardly submit to taking an antibiotic (which literally means, 'against life'), but when 8 mts pregnant I could not shake this head cold that was killing me. I took my weeks worth of pills and then got my first yeast infection...I had stripped my gut of the good bacteria, allowing an overgrowth of yeast (fueled by my 8mt pregnant person consumption of sugary foods). Then you take this child in to get 4 shots, 3 of which contain weakened live viruses that lodge themselves in their gut (measles loves to live in the gut). Not only have they been inundated with loads of additives over the so-called safe limit, they now have to contend with these weak viruses that are running through their body. So the spike a fever, their body is in fighting mode (more inflammation). What if they were already born with a weak immune system (either through genetics or toxic exposure during pregnancy)..add all of this together and it is a disaster for our little baby in the story. This is the multi-system idea behind Autism or other developmental and/or sensory issues in children. So to clarify, I do not believe children get autism from vaccines. I do believe that vaccines can/do cause problems when there are other mitigating circumstances.
3. So this leads to Mattie. Mattie has skin issues. Bad eczema. She is only breastfeed, so something I am eating is driving her gut into inflammation mode, and she cannot (or my diet cannot) pull her out of it (as a side note, with some experimenting, I think it is my dairy consumption (what I shouldn't be eating a bowl of ice cream ever night???)). I refuse to give my already immunologically compromised daughter shots that will drive her immune system into even more inflammation. It only takes so much before your body starts attacking itself or just shutting down (an always sick child for instance). I have a great doctor. He lets us decide her vaccine schedule (we have decided to re-evaluate vaccines for mattie when she is 18mts old), by then her body will be better able to handle any nasty additives should we feel the need to inoculate her against a few things.
4. We are not anti-vaccines. Liliana has had most (expect for ones we personally think are silly and not even worth the pain of the needle, like chicken pox and the flu) Mattie will probably end up with a few important ones like tetanus.
5. We are against the idea of forcing parents to give children shots (by not letting them into schools for instance). We also are against giving vaccines when babies are still in the hospital (like feeling the need to give a Hep B shot (which is a sexually transmittable thing-like our newborn will be sexually active anytime soon).
6. We believe in sound science. Let us honestly examine our current vaccines for the good and the bad in them and see how we can improve on them instead of being secretive and just hoping parents go along with the flow for profit sake.
7. If you want to learn all the science/research behind vaccines, check out that section in the following manual: "Changing the course of Autism:A scientific approach for parents and physicians"
8. If you want to watch the following it will also help explain:
http://anon.autismri.com.edgesuite.net/anon.autismri/Alexandria/HI%20video/DAN_VA_07_Parents_Cave_DSL.mov
Once again, these are decisions that are made by each family. I am sharing what we think/do. I hope this helps answer some questions.
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Love and Logic
So. More on the previous book recommendation.
The premiss behind it is simple:
1. We can teach our children (wisdom) only when with empathy (love). They will not learn a lesson through anger.
2. It is better for them to make their mistakes (bad choices) now and suffer the consequences, than to be older and make bad choices and receive much harsher consequences.
3. We do not need to warn over and over of an impending consequence, the action will teach. Nor do we need to lecture afterwards (this implies our children are dumb and incapable of figuring out why a certain action occurred)
For example (since it is happening this very moment):
We have always had the hardest time with Liliana choosing to act up during family prayer at night. She full well knows what reverence is (as she insist on making sure others are being reverent) and understands why it is important. She just knows that when she ceases to be reverent she gets us going so quick and what young child wouldn't want to take control and get mom and dad all in a tizzy. Anyway, one of her favorite things to do is read books before bed. We encourage this and enjoy going through sometimes 20 books together. We explained that bedtime is at 7pm (she is into clocks and can tell most times, so she likes this) and asked her what things we needed to do before 7. She told us the various going to bed things, including her desire to read books. We got everything done (including scriptures), the last thing we needed to do before book time was say family prayer. Our normal tendency would have been to remind her over and over (warning over and over) that prayer time needed to be reverent or else book time would not happen. We had already said this once. We had to bite our lips shut and not say it anymore. She acted like normal (irreverent) during prayer. So after prayer we said, "so sad, looks like we will be going straight to bed tonight". I am sure you can imagine her response ... in fact the 'response' is still going on 15 mins. later. But that is okay, the more she misbehaves, the more 'fun' it is for us. There are more moments for her to learn wisdom. Right now Jacob is explaining to Liliana that due to all her excess crying, yelling, and carrying on, he is plum tired (energy drain) and that he will talk to mommy and find an appropriate consequence for tomorrow but for her not to worry about it, to just relax. She was very curios about what we needed to talk about. She will find out tomorrow. It will probably be extra chores that will help restore 'energy' back to jacob (which he ''lost' from having to deal with her carrying on). The 'energy drain' symptom is really something you can use when there is a behavior (like lying for instance) that is driving you crazy (or kids fighting), you just say, "mom is plum tired out due to (fill in the blank), what do you think you can do to help put my energy back (or help me feel better, however you want to phrase it)? They get a chance to think for themselves (of a solution) or they can ask you to give suggestions. It just kinda puts the ball in their court to fix any problem their actions have caused. Jacob and I have not yelled in 2 1/2 days! Not once! I knew we yelled alot but when you stop yelling (or pleading, arguing, warning over and over) you realize how often it was exhausting you) We feel great and have actually gotten to enjoy the company of our daughter all day long. Anyway ... anyone with kids enjoy the book...
The premiss behind it is simple:
1. We can teach our children (wisdom) only when with empathy (love). They will not learn a lesson through anger.
2. It is better for them to make their mistakes (bad choices) now and suffer the consequences, than to be older and make bad choices and receive much harsher consequences.
3. We do not need to warn over and over of an impending consequence, the action will teach. Nor do we need to lecture afterwards (this implies our children are dumb and incapable of figuring out why a certain action occurred)
For example (since it is happening this very moment):
We have always had the hardest time with Liliana choosing to act up during family prayer at night. She full well knows what reverence is (as she insist on making sure others are being reverent) and understands why it is important. She just knows that when she ceases to be reverent she gets us going so quick and what young child wouldn't want to take control and get mom and dad all in a tizzy. Anyway, one of her favorite things to do is read books before bed. We encourage this and enjoy going through sometimes 20 books together. We explained that bedtime is at 7pm (she is into clocks and can tell most times, so she likes this) and asked her what things we needed to do before 7. She told us the various going to bed things, including her desire to read books. We got everything done (including scriptures), the last thing we needed to do before book time was say family prayer. Our normal tendency would have been to remind her over and over (warning over and over) that prayer time needed to be reverent or else book time would not happen. We had already said this once. We had to bite our lips shut and not say it anymore. She acted like normal (irreverent) during prayer. So after prayer we said, "so sad, looks like we will be going straight to bed tonight". I am sure you can imagine her response ... in fact the 'response' is still going on 15 mins. later. But that is okay, the more she misbehaves, the more 'fun' it is for us. There are more moments for her to learn wisdom. Right now Jacob is explaining to Liliana that due to all her excess crying, yelling, and carrying on, he is plum tired (energy drain) and that he will talk to mommy and find an appropriate consequence for tomorrow but for her not to worry about it, to just relax. She was very curios about what we needed to talk about. She will find out tomorrow. It will probably be extra chores that will help restore 'energy' back to jacob (which he ''lost' from having to deal with her carrying on). The 'energy drain' symptom is really something you can use when there is a behavior (like lying for instance) that is driving you crazy (or kids fighting), you just say, "mom is plum tired out due to (fill in the blank), what do you think you can do to help put my energy back (or help me feel better, however you want to phrase it)? They get a chance to think for themselves (of a solution) or they can ask you to give suggestions. It just kinda puts the ball in their court to fix any problem their actions have caused. Jacob and I have not yelled in 2 1/2 days! Not once! I knew we yelled alot but when you stop yelling (or pleading, arguing, warning over and over) you realize how often it was exhausting you) We feel great and have actually gotten to enjoy the company of our daughter all day long. Anyway ... anyone with kids enjoy the book...
Saturday, March 22, 2008
thoughts
Well. we really have gotten pretty slack about our post. It is not because I don't think of something every day that I want to share. I just am so busy right now.
There are a few thoughts (random) that I would like to share.
1. The other day, as I was preparing dinner, I looked into the living room to see liliana sleeping on the couch (she had fallen asleep to a movie unexpectedly). As it was almost dinner time (and hence almost bed time) I tried to wake her up. I scooped her up in my arms and went and sat on the floor next to Mattie's car seat (as she had just woken up from her own nap and was hanging out in her car seat). I tried to talk to Liliana but she just was so tired she feel back asleep in my arms. I held my big girl, just as I used to when she was my baby. And I realized how precious this moment was to me. I took advantage of her sleepfulness and ran my fingers across her hair and face, the way I used to when she was all mine (instead of trying to be her own person now). I tucked her hair back, to give the illusion that her hair was short again, just like it used to be back when she was just mine. I had forgotten how soft her skin feels so i rubbed my cheek up against her face. For those few minutes she looked and felt like my little baby, she was just mine. Then she woke up. I love my big girl. But I miss my baby nana terribly! Why do our babies have to grow up. My dad still calls me his baby, now I know why.
2. We want to recommend a book (yes, that is where all my free time goes, I read like crazy!). If you are like us you may spend your days exhausted from arguing, bribing, yelling, stressing, etc. (with your children of course)...We just were always exhausted!
No more...."Love and Logic magic for early childhood". You should know (and those who know liliana know how amazing this is) that within 15 hours our daughter (yes, the same one who has a mind of her own) was literally jumping out of her shoes if she heard the dreaded words (in our case, we chose the following words) "Uh-oh" Anyway, you will have to read (get it from your library, or ILL it, or it is worth buying) to find out why and how we could go 2 whole days so far without breaking a sweat and with having fun disciplining...yes, I said fun.....
Well it is late. We will write more later...
There are a few thoughts (random) that I would like to share.
1. The other day, as I was preparing dinner, I looked into the living room to see liliana sleeping on the couch (she had fallen asleep to a movie unexpectedly). As it was almost dinner time (and hence almost bed time) I tried to wake her up. I scooped her up in my arms and went and sat on the floor next to Mattie's car seat (as she had just woken up from her own nap and was hanging out in her car seat). I tried to talk to Liliana but she just was so tired she feel back asleep in my arms. I held my big girl, just as I used to when she was my baby. And I realized how precious this moment was to me. I took advantage of her sleepfulness and ran my fingers across her hair and face, the way I used to when she was all mine (instead of trying to be her own person now). I tucked her hair back, to give the illusion that her hair was short again, just like it used to be back when she was just mine. I had forgotten how soft her skin feels so i rubbed my cheek up against her face. For those few minutes she looked and felt like my little baby, she was just mine. Then she woke up. I love my big girl. But I miss my baby nana terribly! Why do our babies have to grow up. My dad still calls me his baby, now I know why.
2. We want to recommend a book (yes, that is where all my free time goes, I read like crazy!). If you are like us you may spend your days exhausted from arguing, bribing, yelling, stressing, etc. (with your children of course)...We just were always exhausted!
No more...."Love and Logic magic for early childhood". You should know (and those who know liliana know how amazing this is) that within 15 hours our daughter (yes, the same one who has a mind of her own) was literally jumping out of her shoes if she heard the dreaded words (in our case, we chose the following words) "Uh-oh" Anyway, you will have to read (get it from your library, or ILL it, or it is worth buying) to find out why and how we could go 2 whole days so far without breaking a sweat and with having fun disciplining...yes, I said fun.....
Well it is late. We will write more later...
Friday, March 14, 2008
Raising Tree Huggers
Having just finished my OB rotation, I was let out early and was able to spend an extra day with my family, so we went to down-town Biddeford. We parked the car near a natural food store, where we bought a few things, then decided to walk to the library to get a book that Heather had reserved. On the way to the library, Liliana, dressed in pink galoshes, a flower dress, and a jean jacket, started to run ahead of us, only to stop and grab hold of a small tree. "Look," she said, "I'm hugging a tree!!" Heather and I looked at each other and started to laugh as our little tree hugger ran to the next tree and the next, giving each little tree a hug, laughing to herself all the way.
Monday, March 10, 2008
Daily Bread
Do I seem uptight?
So I randomly decided to grind some wheat and make bread today. It has been quite awhile. Liliana was excited. I put the wheat in the machine and start thumbing through it to look for small stones (as I don't want stone flour after all). She is helping me. I was thinking how grown-up L has become that she can actually contribute to helping instead of toddler style of 'helping'. Anyway, we grind one load and start in on the next. I place the second load in the machine and start picking for rocks again. I grab the phone and she pulls up on the machine and takes the top ring right off, wheat berries go everywhere. Naturally I show my disapointment but over all I kept control of myself (I think) and we just pick them up and put them back in. We start grinding and then start putting the fresh flour in the container. I skip upstairs to feed and change Mattie and come down to flour everywhere. She had decided to transfer the flour back into the wheat grinder (and the counter and the floor). I give a little talk about wastefulness, a subject we continue to try to explain, as I am vacuuming up all my flour (thank goodness it is kinda cheap). Anyway, on our last batch I decide to keep a closer eye on things (thing meaning her)..we are in the stage of looking for small rocks again and she suddenly reached up to my face and rubs it saying, "just calm down mommy it will be alright" (this happens 3 times.)
I don't know WHAT SHE IS TALKING ABOUT...I'M CALM....I'M CALM...
So I randomly decided to grind some wheat and make bread today. It has been quite awhile. Liliana was excited. I put the wheat in the machine and start thumbing through it to look for small stones (as I don't want stone flour after all). She is helping me. I was thinking how grown-up L has become that she can actually contribute to helping instead of toddler style of 'helping'. Anyway, we grind one load and start in on the next. I place the second load in the machine and start picking for rocks again. I grab the phone and she pulls up on the machine and takes the top ring right off, wheat berries go everywhere. Naturally I show my disapointment but over all I kept control of myself (I think) and we just pick them up and put them back in. We start grinding and then start putting the fresh flour in the container. I skip upstairs to feed and change Mattie and come down to flour everywhere. She had decided to transfer the flour back into the wheat grinder (and the counter and the floor). I give a little talk about wastefulness, a subject we continue to try to explain, as I am vacuuming up all my flour (thank goodness it is kinda cheap). Anyway, on our last batch I decide to keep a closer eye on things (thing meaning her)..we are in the stage of looking for small rocks again and she suddenly reached up to my face and rubs it saying, "just calm down mommy it will be alright" (this happens 3 times.)
I don't know WHAT SHE IS TALKING ABOUT...I'M CALM....I'M CALM...
Saturday, March 1, 2008
Big Woman
Well the big woman is 4mts old today! Happy day for Mattie!
Here she is sporting one of her new wool diaper covers. Photo taken today.
I was so excited about her diapers that I think jacob thought I was gonna try to squeeze my own bottom into them!
Anyway here is a little about our growing babe:
* The woman can eat! and eat and eat. If you think you are addicted to food you have not met my girl. On the upside to this, she lights up and squeals just about every time she lays eyes on me (I wonder why?)
* She loves to take showers. Baths, not so interested, but showers make her happy.
* She loves riding on mom (in her sling) and will not settle with being left behind anymore. By golly if there is something interesting going on in the kitchen than she wants to be there!
* If she had teeth she would be a biter! discovered this the hard way.
* She just adores her crazy and loud big sister. They often times compete to see who can screech louder (oh the many things jacob misses out on by being gone so much)
*She almost always needs something in her mouth. and she will take whatever she can get! (her big sister is always trying to sneak mattie some contraband)
*She loves to laugh and is ticklish everywhere.
*Her feet have recently been discovered and she is always trying to catch the little buggers.
* rolling over is starting, can't get herself back over and gets abit mad about that.Can't say I blame her. I would be upset if I couldn't get back over as well (think about a big pregnant woman being pushed on her back, been there, done that)
We love our 'big woman'!!!
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